Terry Hernon MacDonald asked:




You’re dating a person who possesses all the qualities you want, but you’re not feeling the passion. Should you hang on and hope a spark develops, or should you break if off and risk losing a potentially wonderful relationship?

Since some of the most enduring and passionate romances start as friendships, it’s possible your feelings may change, but if you dread the kiss goodnight, they probably won’t. If you like the person as a friend, make your feelings known. Honesty is paramount. Treat others as you would have them treat you, always, especially when it comes to dating.

Your next step is to attract passion. You know what passion feels like, so make a commitment to feeling it twice a day by using the Law of Attraction:

Construct the type of person (but not a specific person) you could fall in love with, bring that person to life in your imagination, and feel yourself in his or her arms. Smell the detergent in his shirt. Feel her breath on your neck.

Where are you? Is he pushing you on a swing in the park? Is it raining? Is there music playing in the background? Where is it coming from? A radio? An ice cream truck?

Feel the passion for him. Feel your heart swell at the sight of her. Feel the flutter in your stomach.

Feel it!

Put your scene to paper, and then make that commitment (and it is a commitment) to bring it to life in your mind twice a day.

Feel it.

Yes, it requires effort. Yes, it requires concentration, but this is the means by which I drew my husband (who I was–and am–passionate about) into my life.

Every now and then, I forget how important this method has been to my success and tell myself, “Oh, it doesn’t really matter much,” but it does. It’s everything.

When you impress your subconscious with your desire, things happen. Here’s what Robert Collier said in his book, first published in 1926, entitled The Secret of the Ages:

“You know you can have what you want, if you want it badly enough
and can believe in it earnestly enough. So tonight, just before
you drop off to sleep, concentrate your thought on this thing that
you most desire from life. BELIEVE that you have it. SEE YOURSELF
possessing it. FEEL yourself using it.”

In addition to bringing goals to life before dropping off to sleep, I like to write affirmations (mine was: “I am happily married to a loyal, loving, reliable, successful, fun man”) while listening to
music that gets me feeling the passion in my head–and in my heart.

A man or woman with whom you can enjoy a supportive, passionate, happy relationship certainly exists.
If you’re holding onto a ho-hum relationship out of fear that you can’t do any better, think about what Madonna said in her 1989 hit, “Express Yourself:”

You deserve the best in life

So if the time isn’t right then move on

Second best is never enough

You’ll do much better baby on your own

Then commit to using the Law of Attraction to get the exciting relationship you deserve. The results will thrill you.

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Trish Anderson asked:




Anosmia is a Greek word describing the inability to smell [Greek an-, without; + Greek osmē, odour]. A communication disorder, like being blind or deaf, anosmia is the result of a dysfunction between the sensory cells in the mouth, nose and throat and the rest of the olfactory system. The thousands of sensory cells we each possess interpret the odours we come into contact with. They add the flavour to food and drink, identify people and locations, send warning signals in cases of fire, and act as the trigger to memories.

Odours are made up of chemical substances and everything around us has a chemical stamp that stimulates our olfactory cells. The human nose is capable of detecting & recognising over 10,000 different scents. That sounds a lot, but a dogs nose is over 1,000 times more sensitive. We may not have the most sensitive smell detector on the planet, but coupled with our ability to reason, interpret, analyse and remember, it’s up there with the most effective.

To smell an odour, the scent first enters the nasal cavity either directly through the nostrils or via the mouth and throat. Once there they come in to contact with the olfactory epitheliums. These are clusters of receptor smells located roughly in line with your cheek bones. The clusters are covered with tiny hairs called cilia and a thin layer of mucus. Each one of the cells inside the cluster [and there are millions of them] is connected to an olfactory neuron or nerve cell. Odour molecules are picked up by the cilia and transferred to the receptor cell. The information is sent along to the olfactory neuron and from there, directly to the brain for processing. Once the smell pattern is processed, the information is transmitted to other parts of the brain to be learned and remembered.

So, what is anosmia? Damage to the olfactory neurons stops the whole process cold, and the bad news is that once damaged the neurons can not be fixed or replaced. Viral infections, chronic sinusitis, nasal obstructions [such as polyps or tumours], medications, dental work, surgery in the nasal area, contact with irritants and chemicals, head injuries and natural aging are all known causes of anosmia. People that are born with this disability are often found [if they can afford to get all the tests done] to have either polyps or a complete lack of olfactory neurons.

What does all this mean and why should we care? Our world is shaped as much by odour as by colour, shape and sound. To be without the ability to detect odour is often described as being cast adrift in a colourless void. Smell-blind is another accurate term. When we meet people, without our consciously realising it, we detect their pheromones and other smells and make decisions about them – whether we’re interested in being friends, lovers or can’t stand to be in their presence. In a group, our smell detectors are busy interpreting the odours people are giving off and using that information to pick up on tensions, fear, happiness, grief, and anger. The person that can walk into a crowded room and immediately “read” the atmosphere or sense a friend’s mood usually also has an excellent sense of smell.

Then there’s the warning signals side of being able to detect scent. People who cannot smell smoke do not know they’re in danger until they see or breathe in clouds of the stuff, or see the flames. Same goes for chemical spills, gas leaks, turned food and stale drinks. An anosmic can identify an unlabelled container of clear liquid as innocent water or dangerous chemical by one of two ways. Drink the stuff or stick your nose close enough that pain can be sensed. Anosmics might not be able to smell but they feel the burn of toxic chemical just like everyone else. Neither of these methods are suitable to a long and healthy life.

Just like other disabilities and disorders, anosmia can be experienced in several ways.

1. Normosmia generally relates to people with a normal sense of smell

2. Hyperosmia is increased sensitivity to odours

3. Dysosmia relates to any defect or impairment of the sense of smell, which is most often used to describe distortions of smell

4. Hyposmia is a common form of anosmia and is generally the diminished or partial loss of the sense of smell

5. Parosmia is the distortion of smells. For instance, taking a sniff of fresh-baked bread and smelling week-old socks

6. Phantosmia [phantom smells], smelling an odour [usually bad] when the stimulus for that odour is not in the immediate environment

7. Presbyosmia is the form of anosmia most related to aging

Taste disorders are linked to anosmia as 75% of anything you “taste” is actually flavour and therefore, smell. There are five tastes: bitter, sweet, sour, salty and savoury [also known as umami]. Most anosmics, if not also afflicted with a taste disorder, can taste perfectly fine. It is the nuance of flavour, an important factor in gustation enjoyment, that is missing.

There are four known taste disorders:

1. Hypogeusia is the diminished sense of taste and like hyposmia is common

2. Hypergeusia is the increased sensitivity to taste

3. Ageusia, the complete loss of the sense of taste

4. Dysgeusia, a distorted sense of taste

How can you help? Awareness in friends and relatives makes a big difference to anosmics. Too often have people with anosmia reported the difficulties in getting friends and family to believe and then to remember that they cannot smell, no matter what is shoved in their faces. Having doctors who are aware helps even more; anosmia is not “all in your mind”.

For close family, be alert to situations where an anosmic can get into “trouble” and thoughtful when it comes to talking about smells. Anosmics can be sensitive about their personal body odour. They will either overcompensate or, without a smell to act as a prompt, forget that they need deodorant. Advise on perfumes and after shaves you think suit them and be tactful when it comes to letting them know they’ve used too much or not enough.

For the anosmics, there are quite a few resources to be found on the web that will be helpful in learning about the condition and linking with others like yourself. The more you know, the more you can explain, and the more you will be understood.

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Ed Opperman asked:




The statistics are alarming. Somewhere in the 75 % range of all married men do not see online dating and conversations as being a form of cheating. Women feel much different, cheating is cheating, no matter when, where or how.

You know the routine. Woman sees the signs of infidelity, is sure she is dealing with a cheating husband but doesn’t know where to go from there. They question “is he cheating” and begin to wonder how they can find out for sure.

And that is where online infidelity assessments come in. These great little services providers can for a few dollars provide a whole worlds worth of answers. Though they cannot help you with surviving infidelity, they can provide you with the solid proof you are seeking. Though the do charge for these services the fees associated with the infidelity assessments are well worth the cost. After all, you cannot place a price tag on your own piece of mind and resolution to a situation as devastating as infidelity.

What exactly do these services do?

They will run through a database of online dating sites (the statistics for infidelity rates in North America are on a scary increase) to determine if your partner is registered with any of the sites. This can indicate they are on the “market” for a new partner, otherwise, what would a married man be doing registered for any of these such sites.

Once found out they can also do another search on your cheating husband to get proof.

They will go to lengths to get the ad they are using to attract a mistress. Some will even go to the extent of trying to make contact with your partner under the surmise of being another women, matching your husbands criteria. They can even take it a step further and try to get them to exchange photos and phone numbers so that you have solid, indisputable proof of what your cheating husband will do or is doing already.

This service can put your mind at ease and help you to come to terms with whether he is cheating or not. These things are not for the light hearted. The news, once more than a suspicion and concrete proof can tear your world apart. You need to ensure you have support for instances when your suspicions of infidelity are proven to be accurate.

If this is what you really want and the route you are seeking to take you should check out online services. With many years in the private investigators industries they bring to the table a wealth of experience and although the Internet and online infidelities are a newer epidemic, they can undertake the task of doing an online infidelity assessment and finally providing you with the proof and answers you need to approach your cheating husband.

Don’t delay though, everyday you wait is another day of your life wasted on a cheating husband, another day of your life that could have been spent coping with infidelity and moving forward in your life. Don’t settle for second best. You deserve to be the only woman in a deserving man’s life. If you are seeing the signs of infidelity online, you need to protect yourself and your emotions and find out the truth.



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V. Valentino asked:




Did your girlfriend just cheat on you? Ouch. Any guy who hasn’t had to go through that is very lucky. Whether you want to get over her or just the fact she cheated on you, I have a few tips for you.

1. Don’t Think About It – The worst thing you can do is keep picturing what happened. If you keep reminding yourself about it, you’re going to stay bitter about it.

Whatever happened, it’s in the past now. If you don’t learn how to blank it out, and you still want to pursue a successful relationship with this girl, you’ll be tempted to bring it up with her and you’ll always be suspicious. Not healthy.

2. Can I Trust Her? – This is a tough one, and you’ll have to make your own judgement call here. Unfortunately, a lot of people who cheat are likely to do it again. Do you really want to go through the stress of knowing it might happen again? If it was a long time ago, then proceed with caution.

If you do decide to take her back, you must trust her completely or not go out with her at all; nothing in between. If you’re always questioning her, asking if she’s sleeping with another man, and generally getting up in arms about it, then she might give up trying and cheat on you again.

Having complete faith in your partner, even if they’ve cheated on you before, is your best shot at avoiding the problem again.

3. Did You Encourage Her? – Not all cases are the cheating partners’ fault. If she was unhappy with you, you may have contributed to it. I’m not talking about how good you are in bed. That’s irrelevant.

Were you always suspicious of her all the time? Were you always accusing her of things she didn’t do? Are you controlling? Are you always jealous? These are all traits that can lead to your girl cheating on you. If she feels happy and free whilst dating you, and less of a possession, chances are she won’t even think about cheating on you.

4. Is She Worth It? – Of course, the problem could be all hers. Some girls (and guys) need to feel desirable. They thrive on as much attention as they can get. If a guy wants them they can’t say no. These types are usually drama queens, to top it off.

Until she grows up, don’t bother. These kinds of women aren’t worth your time, and you’ll just find yourself frustrated. There are plenty of faithful, attractive girls out there. Don’t dedicate your time, energy and emotions into a girl who can’t respect what a faithful relationship is.

5. Have Some Fun Yourself – Only if you’ve broken up with her. I don’t encourage cheating on her as payback. You’ll just find yourself spiraling into a big emotional mess until both of you are left picking up the pieces alone.

If you have broken up with her, see as many girls as you like. Only date, if you don’t want to have sex. Either way, when you start making female friends, you’ll find yourself moving forward. You’ll forget about the past, and you’ll forget about your girlfriend cheating on you. You’ll realize you’re not missing anything, and you’ll feel sorry for the next guy who dates her; you’ll know exactly what he’ll have to put up with.

Decide what you want and stick to it. Have you broken up and you want to get over it? Learn the best way to get over a break-up. Or are you thinking about giving her another chance, but not sure you can trust her? You know her, and you’ve got to decide yourself. Personally, I never give a cheater a second chance, because I know I deserve better and that I can get better.

But if you decide to give her another chance, you need to trust her completely. She may be sorry about it, and she’ll want to know that you trust her. She’ll want to know that you can still believe in her despite what she’s done. If you can’t do this, you may find the problem repeating itself.

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Tony B. Smith asked:




You think your husband is cheating, but you may not know the signs of adultery. You have that “gut” feeling of woman’s intuition. Before you accuse your husband of cheating, you should know the signs first. So, what I’m going to share with you are the signs of adultery.

The signs of a cheating husband are:

1. If you notice that your husband work late often, but his paychecks doesn’t reflect it, he’s probably committing adultery. If he gets paid based on salary, this sign could be tricky. You may have to go to his office to give him a surprise dinner.

If he’s not there, he’s probably out with another woman. You have to be careful and aware that he probably has his co-workers helping him. His co-workers will lie to you to help him cheat.

2. Another sign of a cheating husband is if your husband hangs up his phone every time you walk in the room. He doesn’t want you to know who he’s talking to. And he doesn’t want the woman he’s on the phone with knowing that he’s married either.

3. If you notice that your husband is hiding his credit card statements, then he’s probably committing adultery. He doesn’t want you to see that he’s spending money on another woman.

4. Another sign of a cheating husband is unusual computer activities. If you notice your husband is hiding email accounts from you, he’s probably cheating on you. He could be using his email account to talk to another woman or send and receive pictures from her.

He could also use his email address to start an account with facebook or myspace. He could then use a nickname or fake name and you’ll never know that he’s cheating. This is a technique that’s used by a lot of men who cheat.

These are some signs of a cheating husband. If you notice your husband committing any of these signs of adultery, you need to do something about it. Make sure you don’t accuse him of cheating, yet. First, you should get concrete proof that he’s cheating.

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Wendy Woon asked:




The workplace is a natural breeding ground for romance. But are you able to deal with the challenges of office romance at workplace? You are spending a lot of time with people who have at least one thing in common with you, and, of course, you are in close proximity. If you have a pulse (not to mention hormones), that attractive person at the next desk – or your cute, powerful boss – could look pretty tempting.

However, workplace romance is risky. you still have to function in the same work setting if the relationship fizzles – imagine trying to concentrate on work while your ex is emailing poetry to a new love at the next desk. Workplace romance is also harder to keep under wraps than a celebrity scandal, so be prepared to be the hot topic at the water cooler.

In fact, many companies have very definite policies about workplace fraternization. Not every employer thinks love at work is a beautiful thing. Always make sure you know what your official company policy is before you dip your toe into the love-at-work waters.

If cupid strikes and it’s a coworker you’re attracted to (and this person is sending signals back to you), be careful. Even if the company gives a thumbs-up to your potential relationship, there’s more at stake than just being the subject of office gossip. Both of you need to ask yourself the following questions:

• Are you looking for romance, or are you just interested in having a closer friendship because you are bored or lonely?

• Who else knows that the two of you are interested in each other? Would your romance make these people uncomfortable. Or cause them to hurt your ability to be discreet?

• How will you agree (in advance) to handle things if the relationship sours?

If you decide that the risks are acceptable, or you just can’t control your feelings, don’t start screaming it from the rooftops. Office romances should be handled very carefully and quietly. Canoodling coworkers can make others uncomfortable.

Here are some tips to deal with challenges of office romance at workplace

1. Steer clear of your direct boss or subordinate.

While some office connections may be acceptable, dating the person you report to, or someone who reports to you, is not.

If you insist on being together, it’s advisable to get your reporting relationship changed, which you can do so by transferring to another department or switching jobs.

2. Proceed with caution

You’ll do yourself a favor by taking things slow. Ensure both parties have the maturity, judgment and tact to handle a potentially intense emotional experience in a work environment way before the relationship progresses

3. Be discreet.

It’s advisable to keep your relationship discreet. But even if you don’t decide to keep the affair top secret, displays of affection at the workplace should be refrained. Never give the impression that you take affairs of the heart more seriously than affairs of work.

Always be on your best behavior, and if you do decide to break things off, do so as gently as possible. You should never dump one co-worker for another.

Lastly, if you are just lonely, bored or attracted to someone who might harm your career, consider getting out of the office more, not getting involved at work. The workplace is a place to do business. There are potential new loves outside of your nine-to-five life, just waiting to meet you.

With the above tips, you should be able to better dealing with the challenges of office romance at workplace.

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Dr. Robert Huizenga asked:




Ask someone why they had, or are having an affair and you may hear something like this: “I have a lousy marriage. My marriage is dead. There is no intimacy, no sex, and no excitement. The love is gone. We’ve grown apart. I can’t stand the marriage. There was nothing happening in the marriage and the affair just happened.”

These statements are rationalizations and fail to “get at” the underlying issues of extramarital affairs.

Key points:

1. It’s as if a marriage is an animal gone bad. A marriage does not have a life of it’s own. In reality, there is no such thing as a “marriage.” One is “married” as a result of making some promises and signing a paper at one point. After the paper is signed, two people continue communicating and acting toward one another in particular ways that they hope will help them get what they individually want. Just as there is no “marriage,” there is no such thing as a “relationship.” There are, however, ways of relating for which each person is responsible. Remember the comedian Flip Wilson (that dates me) and his “The devil made me do it” skit?

2. We idealize “marriage” or “romantic relationships” with the expectation we will get what we want, without much effort to boot. The movies, popular public press and romance novels/stories don’t help much here. A “marriage” is behind the eight ball from the word go. “IT” can’t win.

3. From day one most of us don’t have a clue about how to get, build, nurture and maintain healthy and intimate ways of relating. We need ‘love 101’ and it’s not there. We rely upon experimentation or bad models.

4. If the “marriage” is dead, why in the world would one choose to have an affair? Talk about jumping from the frying pan into the fire. It really is stupid. You add a whole layer of deceit and shame that eventually will result in consequences more dire than approaching your spouse and saying, “I’m really unhappy. What I’m doing with you obviously is not working. I want out.” Oh well, maybe some people need more problems and suffering.

5. If the “marriage” is bad, obviously, I don’t have to look at me. I can blame “it” or the other. Some of us find it difficult to look at me. Some of us don’t know how to look at me. Some of us never think of looking at me.

Tip: If your cheating spouse blames their affair on the “marriage,” don’t buy into it. The “marriage” is not the problem. You are not the problem. Your spouse/partner chose the affair out of ignorance, fear or inadequacy.

The “My Marriage Made Me Do It” is just one of 7 affairs outlined in my E-book, “Break Free From the Affair.” For more information on the issues behind the other kinds of affairs and tips for dealing with them, visit my site.

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Lest Brockwell asked:




If your partner is having an affair, he or she will eventually leave a trail. The fundamentals are to recognize what to anticipate. A basic way to contact a lover nowadays is by text messaging, cell phone or through e-mails. You’ll be able to find signals in there demeanor on the phone or when using a computer. If your partner is betraying you you’ll also notice a change in their personal conduct.

What to look for

*Working later hours

Is your partner suddenly working extra hours? They might even go in on a weekend or some other abnormal time. If the extra time doesn’t reflect in their paycheck and there’s no good account for that, I’d start to be a little concerned and look for other signs.

*Smell

Each individual has their own unique scent. You might not even detect it until it becomes substituted with other smells. take notice if your partner smells different, or whenever something in your house or vehicle just doesn’t smell normal. Also, if you notice your partner bringing extra changes of clothing with them, or if you find hidden articles of clothing in their car, this can also signify that they’re trying to cover up smells.

*Gifts

Does your partner come home with things that you know they wouldn’t buy for themselves? This can be overlooked around gift giving holidays or birthdays. Also take a look at your mate’s charge card bills for things that were purchased, that you didn’t get.

*Eating patterns

Is your partner all of the sudden not hungry around normal eating times? Maybe they’ve acquired new tastes for foods or start taking you to new restaurants, they may sub-consciously acquire new tastes from their new lover, this may indicate that they are eating more with them and can be seen as a sign of an affair.

*Computer behavior

If your partner is having an affair; more likely than not they are communicating with the person via computer or cellular telephone. If your partner has an anxious demeanor around the computer once you walk in the room, or you notice them switching windows they may be hiding something from you. Did your mate kindly set up a separate e-mail account for you, so they can have their privacy? Or maybe you’ve discovered that they started a new email account like Yahoo or HotMail, this could be another sign they’ve got something to hide.

*Cell phone behavior

Did your partner get a new work phone and act anxious or nervous when it rings? If you come in on your partner speaking on the phone and they whisper or say something quickly and hang up you should be concerned, question them about who they were talking to. Do people call your house and just hang up a lot?

Of course none of these are exact indicators and may have no significant meaning to them, but if you find yourself already concerned or noticing changes in their behavior, then it’s time to keep your eyes and ears peeled and watch for these signs of an affair.

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